Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player That struts and frets his hour upon...– Macbeth
People do not seem to realise that their opinion of the world is also a...– Ralph Waldo Emerson (via alzati)
My BFF Coming out to her 89 Year old Grandmother
BFF: Grandmother I need to talk to you
Grandma: [concerned voice] What? What is it? Are you sick?
BFF: No, no. Grandma. I'm gay.
BFF: I'm gay Grandma. I have a girlfriend now.
Grandma: [relieved voice] Oh honey, is that all? I thought you had cancer. Anytime someone needs to tell me something they are sick. Who's your girlfriend, when is her birthday? I'll bake her a pie.
teacher: don't bullshit this essay
me: i'm gonna bullshit this essay
officialdogblog: procrastinators are able to do 30 minutes of work in 8 hours and 8 hours of work in the 30 minutes before it’s due
twyll: i have these people i follow who follow me too and i think they’re really cool and stuff and we mutually reblog each other and and sometimes i just sit down and look at their url when it shows up on my dash and im like aw yeah we tight we bros but we’RE NOT???? WEVE NEVER EVEN HAD A CONVERSATION?????
fiercezucchini: those feelings when you want a relationship but you don’t but you do but you don’t
thewholockgames: dean-the-hug-monster: I have a panic disorder. While having an attack one day, I called my boyfirend because I was scared. He hung up the phone as soon as I said that and was over in no time to comfort me. He doesn’t have a car. He lives 10 miles away. He ran. MARRY HIM
jesuschristvevo: *comes to your funeral 15 minutes late with starbucks*
buysexual: to do list; get skinny grow hair out dreads
mutisija: mutisija: *throws confetti* *collects all confetti from floor* *puts the confetti in trash can* *kicks the trash can*
The truth is life is full of joy and full of great sorrow, but you can’t have...– Andre Dubus III, House of Sand and Fog (via larmoyante)
Aristotle: We are what we repeatedly do.
Plato: Well then I guess I'm YOUR MOM
Plato: *high fives Socrates*